The stage is set for a grand production. Camera, lights, action. "Wow!", you're thinking. You take a seat front and center, lights dim, actors in place. A hush falling over the entire theater as the curtain slowly goes up. Undetected by anyone, the faucet drips. Draining all the excitement and enthusiasm from your body. It's left pooling on the floor beside your chair. You attempt to pick it up so no one else slips and falls like you just did.
That's the sort of feeling I get when I make attempts to create something I think is so grand and wonderful in my mind. You set the stage, all the right tools in place, the finished piece in your mind. Filled with excitement and fervent energy waiting to bust loose. All of a sudden "nothing"- it's gone. A voice swept across my mind like a north wind saying "you can't do that", "you're not good enough".
Remember your first experience with being taught "coloring" in school? Seriously-teaching a child to stay within the lines. If you didn't stay within the lines it was not acceptable. That was my first experience being taught "perfection". If anything I did was not "perfect" it will never be acceptable. So there I am, being the
first "critic" of my own works because I am the first to see the final piece.
It was in fourth grade where my first big project evolved. The entire fourth grade was to participate in a "Young Author" contest. We were told we were making books from beginning to end. Birthing a story and creating the hardbound cover. "Oh how exciting", I remember thinking, "maybe this would be something I could be good at". Our finished books would be on display for the entire school to see and be voted on. There's some pressure for you.
The project ran about 4 weeks. Every night after school I would work on it. Researching, checking the spelling and grammar. It was finally finished. I didn't know when the votes were cast or by whom. What I did know was that my story wasn't selected. No honorable mentions given, not even a whisper in my ear of a job well done.
This may all sound so trivial to everyone else but these are the things that we carry all our lives. Yes, it's time to shake that off and say"here I am". What others think of you doesn't matter. What does matter is what you think of "you".
No, not everything ever written, drawn or painted is a masterpiece or a "Pulitzer Prize" winner. The important thing to remember is to "Keep Going". Don't let what others say or think keep you from the things of your heart.
Here is my stage. This was set when I hung a shirt on my easel after it had been washed and I was allowing it to dry. It hung there for several days and I had walked in and out of that room several times not really giving any thought to the shirt at all.
On one particular afternoon, I walked into the room for something I can't remember, when the appearance of the shirt gave me a feeling. The softness, the way it was draped over the easel, the fine stitchery of the shirt, and the feeling of loss of my beloved. The feeling was that the shirt was waiting for something-but what? All these emotions swept over me in a moments time. What a beautiful painting this would make. (No, I am not going to paint what is visible. I am going to take all those emotions and wrap them with a big gorgeous bow in my heart).
The image that resulted in my mind was that of a wedding dress in moonlight. A wedding dress made of the finest silk and lace. To be fashioned with Victorian or Southern flavor (that is my passion). The garment stands poised on a mannequin dripping with etiquette bathed by the groom with Love's Embrace.
This is the first sketch in progress. I will post as I continue with this project. I am using a multipurpose paper which I am enjoying. I am able to create a softness that I hope to duplicate in the final painting. I am also using a #2HB pencil, the same kind the kids use for school. I am enjoying that also.
I hope you will follow along with this project and please feel free to post your comments. Maybe you have a similar story like the one I told of. Please share your story- I would love to hear about it. I would ask one favor however, Please do not take any images from this blog to use as your own-every image created by me is copyright protected. Thanks and I hope you enjoy this posting.
That's the sort of feeling I get when I make attempts to create something I think is so grand and wonderful in my mind. You set the stage, all the right tools in place, the finished piece in your mind. Filled with excitement and fervent energy waiting to bust loose. All of a sudden "nothing"- it's gone. A voice swept across my mind like a north wind saying "you can't do that", "you're not good enough".
Remember your first experience with being taught "coloring" in school? Seriously-teaching a child to stay within the lines. If you didn't stay within the lines it was not acceptable. That was my first experience being taught "perfection". If anything I did was not "perfect" it will never be acceptable. So there I am, being the
first "critic" of my own works because I am the first to see the final piece.
It was in fourth grade where my first big project evolved. The entire fourth grade was to participate in a "Young Author" contest. We were told we were making books from beginning to end. Birthing a story and creating the hardbound cover. "Oh how exciting", I remember thinking, "maybe this would be something I could be good at". Our finished books would be on display for the entire school to see and be voted on. There's some pressure for you.
The project ran about 4 weeks. Every night after school I would work on it. Researching, checking the spelling and grammar. It was finally finished. I didn't know when the votes were cast or by whom. What I did know was that my story wasn't selected. No honorable mentions given, not even a whisper in my ear of a job well done.
This may all sound so trivial to everyone else but these are the things that we carry all our lives. Yes, it's time to shake that off and say"here I am". What others think of you doesn't matter. What does matter is what you think of "you".
No, not everything ever written, drawn or painted is a masterpiece or a "Pulitzer Prize" winner. The important thing to remember is to "Keep Going". Don't let what others say or think keep you from the things of your heart.
Here is my stage. This was set when I hung a shirt on my easel after it had been washed and I was allowing it to dry. It hung there for several days and I had walked in and out of that room several times not really giving any thought to the shirt at all.
 |
| the stage |
The image that resulted in my mind was that of a wedding dress in moonlight. A wedding dress made of the finest silk and lace. To be fashioned with Victorian or Southern flavor (that is my passion). The garment stands poised on a mannequin dripping with etiquette bathed by the groom with Love's Embrace.
 |
| 1st sketch |
I hope you will follow along with this project and please feel free to post your comments. Maybe you have a similar story like the one I told of. Please share your story- I would love to hear about it. I would ask one favor however, Please do not take any images from this blog to use as your own-every image created by me is copyright protected. Thanks and I hope you enjoy this posting.
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